#i don't like feeling rushed to join a fandom and do art
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Discovery in Grief
#i thought i was being original with this idea and then I just looked up the trigun fanart tag on pinterest#bestie nope everyone has done this oh well#i'm 6 months late to the trigun fandom and that's just how I like it#i don't like feeling rushed to join a fandom and do art#anyway#trigun#trigun stampede#vashwood#kinda#nicholas d wolfwood#wolfwood#vash the stampede#my art#trigun fanart#trigun stampede fanart#vash fanart#trigun vash#trigun wolfwood#spiteful art
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Hey Noffy again
These last three episodes. Honestly I am still in shock.
As someone that was in the middel all the time. Right now at least the fandom seems United in being pissed (at what part certainly different, but i don't see anyone really liking this arc)
Right now...I don't think I gather my thoughts enough to say anything about the track the celestial family's arcs are going. Just that I am disappointed.
I am trying to find a way they can safe this arc.
Wich lies with that last but in the mgafs episode. The 'this all feels very orgistrated, moon losing his mind. Killing bloodmoon'. Or something along those lines.
If based on that. There is a sort of 'virus' reveal that some people have been speculating. I want something else to happen.
It still needs to hurt. That earth and lunar gave up on moon. Like it's the virus that made it all so quick and violent? (If that's what they are going for)
But still keep that part of the angst? I dunno. Something along those lines (still don't want old moon back without new moon. Answering for whats going in or the family trying to help. )
Gosh and I hate that sun wasn't here. People saying he needs to make a decision and then he isn't here?
I am afraid of next episode and what they are gonna tell sun. Sun is gonna be so utterly broken.
Uugh I think I am gonna join everyone in the fanfic reading.
I am still holding a sliver of hope they can fix this.
Or more I WANT THE SHOW TO FIX THIS.
I have not been in this community long. (Got introduced just around when Bloodmoon came back. ( A little before that))
I have not interacted with people much except in comments on ao3. Or asks where I can be on anon as I can't use my main. Or in the comments of threads.
But the people have been kind to me. Even if I held a different opinion. I've seen the joy this show gave. The art that it creates. And I am scared this arc is gonna destroy all that. Because people lose motivation because of this arc.
I really really hope not.
I hope the show brings it back. I hope they can do something. Even if for right now it feels like shit.
-noffy
I missed your asks, Noffy 🥺💖
Tbh I had no idea people were speculating about a virus until yesterday, and honestly, if it all ends up being about a virus (or the Ruin virus on Moon) I'll still be so upset. Because I won't be able to stop thinking about how Moon changed a little, became more aggressive and his family abandoned him at the first "No, I don't want help."
This whole arc only confirms the worst fears of all Moons: they will never be loved. They will always be the bad guys. << Which is btw what New Moon feared and talked to Earth about in therapy.
This arc feels rushed, gross, and not only did destroy the family, Moon's entire development was thrown in the trash. They butchered Moon's character. How are they going to fix this? Why tarnish the name of one of the show's protagonists so badly? Someone they're going to need later?
And you know what I hate more than everything? Sun doesn't know anything about what's going on. Puppet went, told him "you have to make a decision", Sun couldn't do it and Puppet went and sent Moon into space. Without authorization from Sun. And I hope Sun is really upset about it in the next episode.
Oh! And by the way! Earth comparing Moon to the creator felt like a stab in the back. The creator is a horrendous being who killed children for his own benefit, who does horrible experiments, and who planned and killed many people. New Moon has never killed anyone, New Moon was always helping his family, New Moon bought a house so Sun could have a place to relax, New Moon helped make Earth's new body with love, New Moon was so concerned about Lunar's well-being (when Eclipse came back) that he asked for and helped build a bodyguard for him.
New Moon was there ALL THE TIME for everyone.
But no one was for him.
I propose that the entire fandom pretend that this arc never happened :3 💖
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The Bad Batch Finale - Thoughts and Thanks
Before I get into spoiler territory, I want to say the most sincere "thank you" I've ever mustered to this fandom.
I've been in fan spaces before, going back almost 15 years - most of that on Tumblr, to boot. I've been in inactive fandoms, small fandoms, big fandoms and "we're watching new episodes together in real time" fandoms ...
And none of them have ever given this sense of community and support. Ever.
There really is something special about The Clone Wars/Bad Batch fans, even within the Prequel lovers or Star Wars fans in general that breeds this kind of sentiment. It's truly unique and I found it at a time in my life when I was the most isolated physically from my support network and struggling to make new friends and connections IRL.
I cannot express in words just how much you all saved me with your validation and support.
The Shades of Blue series was the first fanfic I actually felt comfortable leaving a comment for on Tumblr, and the amazing @the-rain-on-kamino's kind and loving reaction gave me the courage to start writing fanfiction again. Not only that, but actually sharing it for the first time in years.
And after that, everyone else came in one at a time. From @deejadabbles and @sev-on-kamino's delightful, rabid and enabling reactions to my unhinged thots, to @wings-and-beskar supporting my unhealthy Wrecker obsession, to @l-lend being an absolute example of how to engage and interact in fan spaces to make room for everyone, to @wild-karrde, our bastion of supportive engagement and creative celebration (and a kickass writer in her own right) ... you all helped me come out of my shell in ways I can't express in words besides thank you.
@dystopicjumpsuit, @freesia-writes. @anxiouspineapple99, @dickarchivist, @wizardofrozz @523rdrebel
@starrylothcat @starqueensthings @the-bad-batch-baroness @multi-fan-dom-madnessand @moonlightwarriorqueen
You all have listened to my rambles, thoughts, and vent sessions - whether about fandom stuff or not - and I hope I've been able to return a fraction of that support.
@daimyosprincess, girl you get a whole special shoutout for the levels of depravity you encourage my thots to get to :D
And there are so many more!! People I may not talk to frequently (cause sending DMs gives me anxiety), but I see you commenting, liking, reblogging when I post and posting your own amazing writing or art for me to moon over.
@cyarbika, @madameminor, @spacemagicandlaserswords @merkitty49 @vodika-vibes
@kimiheartblade @nika6q @arcsimper5
@soaringthroughthegalaxy @sunshinesdaydream @sinfulsalutations and so so many more.
THANK YOU ALL FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART
I'll still be around simping after our favorite clones. I hope you'll keep joining me.
Now, on to the spoilers!
I have to say overall, I like this conclusion. It's the happy ending we wanted, but if feels earned. I love that the boys got to grow old in peace with Omega. I love that their dedication to one another is reaffirmed and upheld as the strength it is, rather than - as Hemlock saw it - a weakness to exploit. And I loved that last little scene. It felt like a fanfic and I say that lovingly. It felt like the writers and animators put together the fic we all know would have happened if they left the ending on that fadeout of the Batch next to the tree on Pabu. And that felt like a kiss on the forehead as a fan.
Now here's what I didn't like.
I didn't like that they clearly rushed the end. Pacing wise, there were so many moments that were slowed down so you can feel the emotional impact ... but the editing of the scenes around them made this slower pace a mistake to me.
Like when Echo and Omega are sending Emerie and the kids away ... they all hug and take time to talk about their plan. BUT YOU DON'T HAVE TIME. We know Hemlock has the others. We know Tarkin is on his way. YOU DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS SCENE TO HAPPEN HERE and Echo of all people would be on that, moving everyone along as he is trained to do. It feels artificial because we go from high intensity and fast paced to slow and dragging when nothing from the fast paced scene had been resolved. I think this could have been different if the scene with the kids in the hanger came before the Batch gets in to the hanger and knocked out. It would be a break from the fast pace of the Zillo escape, but without the immediate urgency of a rescue weighing over them (and us! I was having heart palpitations!). It also would then match the tone and sentiment of the scene between Hunter, Wrecker and Crosshair in the woods ("Omega needs all of us.").
These pacing issues are editing issues, and I think we're really seeing how post-production was truncated to get this out on time (or possible pre-production and storyboarding was truncated). I hate that production studios are making this practice more common to cut costs. We will wait longer for better quality storytelling.
My final example of this is Crosshair's story resolution. It doesn't happen. He still thinks he deserves to die on Tantiss (the sentiment from S3 Ep1) and even though Hunter and Wrecker tell him otherwise, we don't know if he internalizes that. And his climax is about trusting Omega to know what to do to take the shot. But Crosshair has (in this season) shown he always trusts Omega. It would have been better if his hand was still shaking and Hunter said "Omega trusts you. You'll make this shot." so that the external conflict for Crosshair is resolved by resolving his internal conflict and trusting himself as his family does. And it would leave Hunter's climax the same - trusting Omega as an competent member of the team.
It just feels rushed. Or like an abstract painting that almost looks like a real object, but just a little blurry. They almost stuck a perfect landing, but just missed the mark a bit.
I also hate how this means Wrecker gets fuck all resolution. The entire last episode was a really intriguing challenge for him. He knows Cross is off his game and Hunter is getting desperate and reckless again ... just as he is almost entirely knocked out of the fight from an injury. Him, the strong one. That should have been a great moment of growth for him. That he doesn't keep going because he always can -- which is very much how he comes across in TCW S7 and TBB S1 -- but that he actively makes himself the strong one, the supportive one, because that's what his family needs.
But no, we didn't get that. We didn't get any insight into Wrecker at all, despite him being the one to free his brothers enough for them to save Omega (and he saved Echo, too!). And then he doesn't speak again, though we see how banged up he is. I get it was less of a focus throughout the series, but man they didn't need to sideline my husband like that.
And finally, Tech.
Look, I may be delulu, but contextually, there was plenty of evidence that CX-2 was Tech. From speech and mannerisms to his blatant disregard for orders, to the seemingly personal level he took his missions.
But it's more than that - why show us this big tense moment of him breaking onto Phee's ship, which the focus being on Phee sensing him near? Why not just have that in the dialog with Hemlock the way Cid's confession was? That would have saved so much time that could have been put elsewhere. Why have such a focus on him in the marketing?
I'm not mad that Tech is dead. Let me make that clear. The showrunners said from the start they killed Tech to prove there are real, lasting consequences to characters' decisions. And I can respect that. And I can understand and appreciate the interpretation that CX-2 wasn't meant to rep Tech, but rather what the Empire can turn clones into, a threat to them all not just in the danger CX-2 poses, but the danger if they get caught.
And that's fair ... but then it could (and should have) been any and every CX trooper to fit that bill. There was no need to waste time and attention on one in particular.
And to be, that also ignores the clear wall of contextual and subtextual evidence that a reveal was planned. The posters are a great example.
Here is the Batch in the final poster:
And here is CX-2
He's standing at Crosshair's right, just out of frame. The lighting matches and he's even looking up to the right just like the rest of his brothers. The line of light cutting his left side even matches the one cutting above Crosshair's right side.
All the other posters showing Bad Batch adversaries has them lit more darkly or in shadow and has unique posing and positioning that do not reflect our heroes.
Why are we styling a brainwashed clone like one of the Batchers artistically? That's a weird choice.
I think the some big wigs wanted him back and others didn't want to water down the impact of his death and we're seeing that confusion and conflict on screen, when we really shouldn't. IDK if Disney was pushing it or the showrunners but either way, going halfsies and changing your mind (and impacting the resolutions we got because of it) is not a good look, especially from a studio like Disney/Lucasfilm. I'm not blaming Dave or Jen wholly, but we the audience should never be able to see the writer's room when we watch, and that's all I was able to see with this.
(My own husband was like "we are supposed to think that's Tech, right?" and he's not really a Bad Batch fan, he just indulges me.)
Alright, that's all I got. I'm happy with how my comfort show ended, I'll write fanfic to cover the pieces I don't agree with personally, and I'll remain ever grateful and supportive of the community who gave me this most precious gift.
I love you all.
And may the force be with you.
#the bad batch#tbb spoilers#tbb season 3 spoilers#tbb s3 spoilers#tbb wrecker#tbb hunter#tbb crosshair#tbb omega#tbb tech#emerie karr
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Okay!! So!! Blah posted art of library monster Maxim so I am going to do a little bit writing for the au here on Tumblr bc why not!!
Context that you barely need due to the fact it won't be mentioned or be important:
• it is an isekai au! Pretty classic isekai stuff! VR-LA was a guy in a normal modern world, he liked a video game, something happened and he ended up in the game's world! Simple stuff, he runs off from home, starts the adventure from the game, cheeses some stuff with his knowledge. He's having a great time mostly.
• Maxim was a npc and optional boss fight! He was in the library, enforced its rules, etc. he just there, he has mechanical bugs as library assistants. He was well loved by the fandom, by his designer, by his two voice actors, by the writers, etc. he did willingly make himself this, but some of the negative effects weren't intentional, and he did not do it for mentally healthy reasons.
• the old crew are explorers and MR-SN dies at a certain time in the game unless you do a bunch of a side quests and explore a lot of places first. It was a meme bc most people don't do that or even talk to them enough to care, so learning about it every playthrough became just funny. VR-LA joins them after saving the world!
Anyway none of that matters bc this is just going to be about VR-LA and Maxim in the library. Writing time
CW repeated mention of blood and injury
VR-LA had a very specific routine each time he returned to the library. He cleaned off his boots outside, ensuring he brought in as little mud as possible from dragging himself through the desolate wilds around it. He stepped inside and removed his outer coat in the entryway, folding it and placing it into his bag, attempting to look presentable. He made sure any of his louder items were tucked away so any clanking, clicking, ticking, or chiming was kept to a minimum. Each step so he wouldn't break any of the rules of the library.
Today though, he couldn't. Snow was piling up outside the door, his sides aching from wounds that potions made harmless, his outer coat stuck to his vest from dried blood, his legs feeling like they may give out from lack of break and hours of movement. He stumbled to the first door, pressing his hand against the knocker which sat at the center, made to be in the shape of the same sort of monster as the library's protector. After a second, the ring within the mouth of the decoration knocked against the door on its own, and VR-LA heard a subtle click. Hopefully Maxim wouldn't mind VR-LA resting in only the entryway before he straightened up, VR-LA wasn't sure if he could handle that fight in this state.
VR-LA pulled the door open, immediately feeling a rush of warm air from within. He hurried into the entryway, pulling the door shut behind him. He sat on the floor, pulling his backpack off his shoulder. The game always made travelling like that seem so easy.
There was buzzing from above him, most likely one of the assistants coming to examine the guest. VR-LA rather hoped Maxim would be too busy to greet him immediately, even if that was unlikely. He leaned his head back against the wall, squinting up at the large mechanical bee. It turned away, going through a hexagon passageway built too high up the wall for a human to ever go through and deeper into the library.
VR-LA took a deep breath, his eyes feeling heavy from exhaustion. If he stayed leaning back like this, he probably wouldn't be able to stay awake. He pushed himself to sit up straighter, focusing on his coat and vest first. He wouldn't be able to remove them separately in their current state, so his vest would have to be unbuttoned first. He was lucky the blood wasn't his own or the shirt would have had to go too.
There was a loud slam of the door at the other end of the entryway, startling VR-LA right as his cold hands managed to get through the first button. And he was quickly up in the air, teeth holding onto the back of his coat. "VR-LA." Maxim growled. Today's the day. Today's the day Maxim throws VR-LA out forever. Maxim was carrying him into the library as he spoke in a rather muffled manner. "I have potions within my nest. Once your injuries are dealt with, we will discuss the cause-"
Oh! "I had a potion for them an hour ago, this blood isn't mine." VR-LA replied awkwardly.
"So you had been injured?"
"Yes?"
"Then it is a requirement you rest." Maxim dropped VR-LA onto a random couch, one far too tiny for the monster to put himself on, given he was almost as large as the elephants of VR-LA's original world. His sat on the ground in front of VR-LA, using his front paws to adjust VR-LA surprisingly nimbly, like he was more of a doll than a person, before VR-LA himself even got the chance to. Large claws were unbuttoning his vest more nimbly than his own could've, Maxim squinting to get the good look he needed. "How long were you in the cold while dressed like this?" Maxim asked, the beans of his paws briefly brushing against VR-LA's side as he tried to check under the vest to confirm VR-LA's words.
"Most of today?"
"It is nearly night and that is not nearly enough for the snow. The fabric is too thin." And with that, Maxim draped a wing over VR-LA. Soft feathers brushed against his face and sides, the rich coppers and browns of them glittering slightly in the light. "It will do your journey no good to die of cold."
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(Wow, that's a long post)
I see so many people who like creating explanations about Hermitcraft/Life series, creating tons of lore and interpret relationships. Especially with Life series, because it's half roleplay server and has a lot of plot and stories potential. Do people remember their previous life? Do they die and reborn? Do they remember each other, do they have scars from previous death? All that lore stuff.
I'm just.. I don't know. I guess I'm not a big fan of more serious roleplay and don't really think about relationships between characters, or the world of Life series itself.
For me it's all just minecraft servers where friends can play and talk and laugh. When I watch Life series, I imagine not characters, but real people. When Scar is talking, I imagine actual irl Scar, sitting on the computer with microphone and talking with his salesman grin. They remember previous seasons and don't think about it as lore, they just remember good times from the past. And after an end of the season they all are in one big group in discord discussing, laughing and talking how they will edit the episode.
Basically, that's the reason, why I animate only funny moments and often draw the irl side of hermits. I would love to draw something more "serious" or create a dramatic amv and be a part of this fandom community, but sadly it's not really my vibe.
In their videos hermits talk a lot about their life and wifes and maybe children.
I remember when Scar wanted to ask something to Xisuma who was afk, Xisuma said, he heard Scar through the headphones across the room. And I imagine actual human Xisuma, his room, microphone, how he rushes through that said room to quickly join the game.
I actually think a lot about irl side of hermits.
I imagine Grian sitting in the living room and doing taxes. Impulse loads the dishwasher. Doc plays with Doccy and teach them about pigeons and sparrows. Joel's in a grocery store decides if he should buy more expensive cheese this time or buy the usual. Mumbo watching videos and procrastinating to go do laundry. Xisuma writes articles about new songs and having a little art block while creating his own music.
I drew irl Grian so many times lol. I really like the irl side of youtubers, they feel more alive.
I don't really know how some hermits (and other people) look, but I still try to imagine them.
So that's why I won't do any lore or angsty animatics. But I still like a lot of AU fanarts, if they are drawn really good or interesting.
So because of all that I feel a little bit outside of the fandom... Like, everyone are having fun, sharing theories, fascinating AUs, drawing cool fanarts for each others. And I'm like.. not into that, I'm sorry. I still want to talk to all of you! I just can't really contribute. So here are my lighthearted funny animatics with 0% angst and where people are nothing more than just good friends on minecraft server.
I believe, people like me don't really watch fanarts or animatics and don't actually know about this whole side of the fandom. I wonder how many of them are here on tumblr ot twitter.
Is there anyone here who thinks the same way?
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I said something similar on my blog but I feel I didn't word my thoughts better:
The newer phases' art styles feel too polished for me, from the lineart to the boring shading and saturated colors. (Especially with phase 6) I miss the messy feel of Phase 2, 3, and even 4 because it still kept the feeling of the older phases. Phase 5 I'm iffy on because imo it still looks fine with the colors but still has that modern Gorillaz art style I dislike but it still sorta felt experimental in a way?-. On it's own the art styles are...Alright, but for Gorillaz I just don't think it fits, I love the cartoony art style from the earlier and find it more charming and memorable. I don't think I'm saying this out of nostalgia (I joined the fandom during 2018, lmao) I think it's just because of my own preferences
I saw someone say that it's like Jamie is trying to make the characters more conventionally attractive and I couldn't agree more.
hmmm ..... ive heard many people say this but i have mixed thoughts on it.
the tone of gorillaz overall taking a turn towards being more brand-friendly is definitely a factor, but i dont think its the only one. i really do think jamie gets bored and its not just me speculating, apparently he said he was "fucking bored of drawing those characters" in 2008, yes, since BEFORE PHASE 3. i do still think he has a lot of enjoyment in drawing them (otherwise he'd probably quit) but you can really tell when he's drawn something just because he felt like he had to. that's why gorillaz promotional art seems to be increasingly lacking in personality, imo. something really changed around song machine era where stuff was just getting pushed out as fast as possible and predictably got rushed. because ive brought this up before, if youve seen his art in the gorillaz artbook it's an entirely different vibe than promotional artwork cause thats the stuff where he does whatever he wants and is free to experiment. but that level of experimentation that he wants to do is very non-commercial, and it would've been in any phase. (that semi-realistic murdoc rasputin picture freaked people out when it was released but thats the kind of thing he really wants to do!!)
it's not only got a lot more personality and life to it but it's retained that edge that earlier gorillaz art had, despite using brighter colors and overall more poppy visuals. there's a murdoc shrunken head ffs. i really like it. i hope we see more of that kind of stuff in phase 8.
here is the edgy 2d everyone's been asking to make a comeback, in the 2020's:
personally i dont mind the brighter colors and overall more clean and lighter vibe. it doesnt resonate with me quite as much, but i dont think its neccessarily a sign of becoming more commercial. it can look that way and have edge at the same time as seen in the artbook.
murdoc becoming neon green is an eyesore often times but i think it's made up for by the fact that it's really funny in an ironic meta way. some day he will just transcend the color spectrum visible to the human eye probably....
i dont see how the characters have gotten more conventionally attractive. for example noodle had her whole eyebrow shaved off on the meanwhile ep art. theyve always been ugly and to get rid of that youd have to change their designs and personalities to make them unrecognizable. plus i think murdoc's actually somehow managed to get uglier... his face looks more misshapen as he's aged.
one thing i dont like in newer gorillaz art that i havent seen anyone else point out is how much jamie's horniness leaks into it. maybe i have just noticed it more than everyone else. dont get me wrong i think its totally fine if he draws that stuff on his own time of his characters if he wants to but when it gets into official gorillaz stuff its just plain weird and unneccessary and makes me uncomfortable 😭 like wtf ....
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Minor Update!
I don't really know how to actually start this but heyoooooooo! It's been a while and I've been on and off but I'm officially back again!
I know I say I'm coming back a lot but I do legitimately mean it this time! XD I've had a LOT of stuff on my plate to deal with but I'm trying to take everything one step at a time.
I got a LOT of new art to share so I'm happy to get that started tomorrow!
Overall, it's been a really strange and tumultuous time for me but it's beginning to mellow out somewhat. I've been trying get back to enjoying making art and such and recovering from kinda the absolute emotional black hole I was in last year. It's gotten a lot better since then but y'know. Recovery still takes time.
In any case, I'm not sure if I'll get back to making Stanley Parable stuff soon. Part of my funk was subconsciously forcing myself into making content for the engagement it got me and while I do feel myself going through the withdrawal of not having a whole bunch of engagement like before, I think it's ultimately healthier. It helps to get me back to making art I'm currently interested in. That being said, I WILL return to it but in my own time. Not gonna rush things too much.
That being said, I'm hoping everyone is open to seeing more of my other stuff! Phantom of the Opera is probably the biggest thing on my brain at the moment so be prepared to see some of that XD. I also really want to share more of my OCs as well!
And once again, I'm kinda planning to share more casual writing on here. Kinda like opinion pieces/reviews of stuff and headcanons a bit more freely. (One of the things about me that I've realized is that I really held myself back bc of my perfectionism and unnecessary need to prove myself in fandom spaces so no more of that.)
Anyway, I'm rambling. I'm excited to start kind of a new chapter here on Tumblr! As bad as my experience of a lot of personal stuff was last year, it's definitely taught me a lot in how to approach things this time around this year! And I hope y'all continue to join me in this journey. 😁😁
- Vi
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Questions and Answers
***More will be added as questions come in***
What is a Big Bang?: A Big Bang is a specific type of challenge involving long fics and accompanying artwork. This type of challenge is a reprise of the old zine tradition of collaboration between artists and writers for internet fandoms. Most Big Bangs have a similar format: Writers sign up and begin writing stories. When the early drafts of the stories are available, each one is assigned one or more artists, or artists might claim stories from posted summaries. Artists create fanart to go along with the story. This art can take the form of illustrations, manips, photo collages, vids, icon sets, etc.
Why is the timeline so long?: The reasoning being, I want there to be enough time for people to handle stuff at home and not to feel rushed about this event. I know life can get in the way, and if it does, you have time to focus on other things and still get back to this. I'm also taking into account those who might be making longer stories, and need more time.
What happens if no artist picks your writing? Do not worry! Anyone who is participating as a main writer will get paired with an artist. What we plan to do is the artist will pick three of the writers they want to make art for, and we will pick from there.
Traditional art is allowed right? Yes! Traditional art is allowed! We don't want only digital artists to participate because what's the point of making an event about inclusion and not include people who prefer a certain art style, or that is the only route they can take. If you do go this route though, you will either need to know how to scan to your computer, or get an image clear enough on your phone/tablet to post along side your paired writer.
Is a discord/twitter required? Nope! We do have a twitter page, we do have a discord server, but they are not required, they just get more information to you (the twitter page will be strictly for posting because Nimona traction there is not great). We do suggest joining the discord if you want to brainstorm with other potential nimona big bang participants though!
Is tumblr required? This is also not required, though it is easier to follow along if you do have an account. But, like a couple questions down, if you have a limited selection of socials to communicate with, we will pair you with someone who has a similar communication method as you so you don't have to forfeit the event!
I want to participate in two roles, but I might need to drop out of one due to life scheduling conflicting. What do you suggest I handle this? One, it's okay to drop out if life gets in the way. This is a fandom event, not a job or a requirement. Two, if you feel as though you will have trouble meeting due date requirements for either role, let the mod for that role know so we can work out what the best course of action would be. Especially if it is closing towards the due date for dropping out.
I have a very limited selection of socials to communicate with! What do I do? When pairing concludes and we send out the emails to the participants, there will be a list of socials that they put into the form for you to choose from. And, if you don't have a similar social, there is always the email that you guys can go back and forth with as well. However, we will try to keep similar socials matched up with artist and writer.
Is the event allowed for 18+ only? Not at all, this event is for everyone who is able/wants to participate. However, if there is a nsfw fic being written, we will pair artists who are 18+ with that writer.
Summaries are due in mid-april, but am I allowed to start working on the actual writing before that? For your writing, as long as you don’t share the writing prompts, unless in the discord server under the event category, you can totally work on the story. I would definitely help if you wanted to provide an excerpt when we ask for them when we get stuff rolling for the pairings.
Do I need to send a summary to anyone before I start writing? When sending a summary, if you have already signed up for the big bang, keeping an eye on your email when the writer and artist signups are closed is a huge thing because we will contact with participants though there.
Are multi-chapters allowed, or should it be strictly a oneshot? As long as you reach the 5,000 word minimum, if multiple chapters works best for your story, then by all means, make it a multi-chapter.
Are OCs allowed? Yes as long as the main three characters (Ambrosius, Ballister and Nimona) are still the main focus/are not turned into side characters for the story.
I might mention drug use of some kind in my writing, or have a dark undertone, is that alright? Yes NSFW content is allowed. But note that NSFW content is not limited to just sex scenes. It can be high violence where someone dies in great detail, alcohol use, drug use, even graphic details regarding self harm. If you do plan to include this type of content and are underage (under the 17- category) I would rethink your story and how oh are going to deliver it because too much detail will trail into the NSFW category and will require an 18+ participant to finish writing.
Wanted to know if the writers will be allowed to write any story whatsoever, or will they be given a certain prompt or theme? No certain prompts or themes needed to follow, but there is no rape or non-con allowed! It is a touchy subject and I do not want to trigger anyone with the subject. I'm going to go ahead and say Dub-con is also off the table because it can go intrude out of the gray area very quickly.
I know I'm 18+, but I'd still like to not do anything explicit, like sex or violence. I hope that's ok? Absolutely. If you are uncomfortable with a topic as an artist, then don't pick it. If you want to avoid the nsfw options altogether, just send one of the mods a message so we can ensure you get the 17- layout which will not have any nsfw options. Otherwise, we will read the 18+ and email and send you all the options, which you can still vote to not work with.
I'd like to be a writer in the Big Bang, but I don't have anyone to beta read my works yet, and I was wondering if writers will be paired up with beta readers or if we have to find our own We do have beta sign ups and hope to have a 2:1 ratio of betas to writers so there is one beta per two writers. This is for cases such as your own. So, don't worry! However, if you do get a beta outside of the event, please let us know so we can mark that down before the 4th check-in.
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DFF & the Contemporary Issue of Trends
Last time I came onto this tag I was grasping at the last droplet of hope I had for the ending to be good.
I decided to tell you all about the great seen of Tee's confrontation with Non's dead body.
Before that I tried to guess who White might be in the story and what was happening with Phee and how and why Tan was New.
And along the way I made polls and memes and I joined this fandom in appreciating what seemed to be another great story by BOC.
We've all dedicated so much time and care and love and talent and skill to contribute to this community, to make something great around something we were growing to love...
But now we're all left neck deep in the mud, as another series with great potential bites the dust in a terrible manner.
And I'm here as the ominous oracle of the death and peril yet to come, in good Greek Tragedy fashion, to tell you this was not the 1st time we've witnessed this and it shall not be the last. And all bc contemporary media have taken 1 thing to their heart and 1 thing only: engagement.
So let's take a step back.
What fuels people? What sticks with them?
How many times a day do you remember you love your loved ones in a week? Perhaps not many. But how many times do you remember the guy the big car crash you witnessed on your way home the week it happened? A lot, probably.
Why? Bc it's new, it's shocking and it probably fuels you with either fear or frustration.
The same can be said about contemporary trends. They're new, shocking and probably fuel a negative emotion in you. So they get talked about A LOT. All at once.
This is the reason why media is becoming what it is. It's realized all st once, tried to rush through plots and plots to be relevant all the while. Makes twists and twists and twists. And has something controversial to it. Bc this will make people talk. And talk will get more people to consume.
Until of course, the next more appalling thing happens and everyone moves on.
God, this is even true in the news. I mean... How many times do you hear about good projects? Or art? But hoe many times do you hear about murder?? No wonder we're growing desensitized to it. It's all we hear about all the time!!
DFF is just another case. Another series in a sea of them that tried to be shocking and play with expectations to keep people talking.
My question is, however: and now what? Now what?
Sure, we're all talking about it cause we're shocked and pissed. But adter the emotions settle and the curiosity to find out the fuck went wrong dies out, what happens?
Don't get me wrong, I love this fandom but the series itself? It'll mostly fade away. It's not something I want to create anything for anymore. I don't have care for it any longer bc why would I??? If no one bothered to mind writing something that even made sense, why should I care to love it??
And I feel like I'm not the only one!
This fandom will die. Like many other have. And what will the creators have achieved?
I never thought about The Untamed with too much fervor, for example. And most of us have not. But if I go into its tag here or on AO3, there's still stuff being made for it. And everyone once in a while, I'll think about it and I'll coke back to it and I'll cherish and nurture it for what it is. And the fandom's there. And sure rn I haven't interacted with that fandom in a bit. And I've been on DFF's tag nearly every day. But in a year, maybe even just a few months, I'll still be thinking and coming back to Xue Yang and Wei Ying and Jiang Cheng and Wen Qing... I won't be coming back to this mess, though. And in the end, it might not matter to anyone, but it matters to artists, doesn't it?
We make things because we are humans and we wish to connect with others. We wanna live forever in the things we live behind. But a story can't be told if there's no one to tell it to. You can't live forever in a void where no one awaits you.
So, in the end, we have consumed DFF, they have their money. But it will die and be buried together with all the people who have buzzed me while I was crossing the street or didn't held a door for me or were annoying to me on the bus. While other series, nourished with more love, will be there with me and many others, accumulating all the times we thought about them through the years, alive and well.
#it's like watching a child I raised falling into a drug addiction man#=/#dff the series#dead friend forever#dff#dead friend forever the series
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Hey! Sorry for popping in as anon, I'm genuinely not sure if some of the things I'm going to say are going to be nice, and I am a coward. But this is regarding you quitting to post in the RA fandom. If you consider my opinion on this as unwanted/unnecessary, do not feel obliged to reply. (Though I honestly think you never feel like that anyway)
I first saw your art when I joined the RA tag a while ago, and I thought to myself: 'Huh. Nice art, not my cup of tea though.' Since then, you have changed my mind. Your obsession with TRR Will and repeated posting about it not only has changed my thoughts on your art (I've really grown to like it) but also on the character of Will himself. I was on Reddit during that massive TRR Will hate phase and some of these posts had really tainted my view. You changed that and I am so grateful for that. Not seeing your art anymore will be sad, but I suppose my own lack of interaction is to blame for that. I made my bed so now I sleep in it. Your reaction to stop posting is justified and understandable, but that doesn't mean I'm not going to miss seeing your TRR Will on my dash.
Who knows what the RA movie (if it ever does come out) will do to this fandom, but I hope that new faces might get things swinging enough again for you to rejoin the fandom. Lastly, I have to say that for me, you've been a legend in this fandom, and will continue to be one, even if you focus on other things from now on.
Well hello there, this was unexpected. First of all thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to write to me! The reception to that post has been overwhelmingly positive even though it hasn't been up for that long and it makes me feel very glad I finally pushed myself to write that official goodbye message.
I don't know who you are and I don't really have any guesses, your message implies you didn't interact with my posts a lot so maybe I saw you around only a few times (?), but you have no idea how much this means to me. Throughout most of my time in the fandom my main goal was always to change people's minds about TRR and more specifically, TRR Will. I've heard that I succeeded many times and honestly, that was one of the biggest reasons I could keep myself so pumped up about a book series I read all the way back when I was in middle school (<- an adult saying this)
Seeing people go from "Cool post, not my thing though." to "Well I can kind of see what you mean when you say it like that." to "I agree, this does sound pretty good!" was both my biggest source of pride and motivator here. Hearing you say I changed your mind just now has the same effect on me, it almost makes me want to rush to my computer to draw or write about Will.
Also, extremely bold of you to say you didn't like my art at first motherfucker /j
Speaking seriously though, my art style practically grew here. When I first joined the fandom I was NOT good; hell, I can't look past anything before July of last year still. Maybe it was just me improving artistically that helped you warm up to my stuff more. I really really hope the new artists have that kind of experience too! You get obsessed with a little guy and then your brain decides to level up as fast as possible. TRR Will is that little guy for me.
Your last words are so, so kind. The way you speak about me here in general is extremely kind. I'm glad I was able to leave a good impression. And you're right, maybe all I need is a break and when I come back this space will feel more fitting again.
Like I said, I still have lots of connections to this fandom via others. I'm still technically helping out with the Gathering stuff, so maybe I'll work on doing a prompt or two still! I'm also a mod in the NSFW server and I love that place, I'm not leaving it anytime soon. If more TRR books come out you can bet I won't be able to shut up about them anyway, if I don't make at least one post then assume I'm dead.
What I'm trying to say is, I'll be around! Our paths will cross again.
PS: The entirety of the RA subreddit can suck my dick. I'm gatekeeping older, experienced Will from all of them. None of them deserve him.
#sorry for how long this got#wanted it to feel like a chat with everyone since i dont know how many people will stick around or for how long#talking to my audience one last time /j#🍂 textpost
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OMORI Runaway AU (title subject to change)
So this is my own take on a runaway au, featuring my OC, Mari, and Sunny. This is an askblog and will focus on RW stuff only. Hopefully, this goes more successfully than my other askblogs, which are lost to time now.
This blog may not have much art. But any art featured are either commissions I bought or stuff you guys did yourselves and submitted.
RULES
Standard DNI rules (no pedos, racists, homophobes, proshitters, politics, assholes, discrimination, spamming, etc.)
No NSFW (still not sure if violence is counted)
Do not piss off the mun. Self-explanatory.
Please do NOT go overboard with the angst. I get that some people really like angst, but please try to ask non-angst stuff too.
DO NOT DEMONIZE, VILIFY, OR MISCHARACTERIZE ANYONE HERE. I don't think I need to explain myself, as this fandom has an unhealthy obsession with pulling this shit.
Do not get upset because I didn't respond to your ask. I'm a college student and trying to do many things at once. Don't rush me.
I reserve the right to decline any asks, if necessary.
SETUP
Day of argument....
Everything is similar to canon up until the day of the argument.
Erika arrives home early after riding her motorcycle to check on her siblings, stumbling upon their argument. She immediately intervenes, breaking it up and demanding to know what was going on.
It was the first time Mari and Sunny ever saw Erika truly upset with THEM, something that is so rare for her to the point of being unheard of.
Erika let Sunny rush to his and Mari's room, before bringing Mari down to the dining room to tell her what was going on. Mari reluctantly explains what she's been going through. Erika saves her response for later, coaxing Sunny to join them and tell them what he's been struggling with.
Mari is remorseful and hurt that Sunny was struggling this entire time and she didn't even notice. Sunny feels awful because he ruined the recital before it began and disappointed Mari and Erika.
Erika responds that she is disappointed that, despite the two looking up to her a great deal, they seemingly did not trust her enough to tell her what was going on. And she's hurt by that.
Eventually, Erika throws the violin away, before bringing the siblings to rent one. Mari and Sunny are silent the entire time, still processing their mistakes and Erika's disappointment.
It's only after the recital and the return home that the siblings' parents find out what happened. They're also disappointed, but Erika defends her sister and brother, explaining the stress they were under.
Seemingly, this is enough to squash any more potential arguments from forming for the day. Unfortunately, things would only continue a few weeks later.
Post-argument....
Over the next few months, Mari and Sunny try to be more honest, both with each other and Erika. Erika, for the time being, serves as the middle man and defends her siblings' mental and physical wellbeing.
After Mari turns 16, Erika notices that her struggles are getting worse. Erika notices the signs of emotional abuse and has her siblings spend the night at Basil's, giving her a chance to speak with her parents alone.
Unfortunately, she can't convince them to be honest with her. She warns them that she will protect her siblings by any means, before leaving. She makes preparations to get her siblings out of there.
By the time Sunny turns 13, Erika finally has enough. Sunny reveals just how mistreated he is, which angers his sister greatly. He reveals that Mari managed to prevent more harm. Erika assumes that she might get the same treatment too eventually.
She instructs the two to pack as much of their clothes and necessities as possible. Late at night, after the parents are long since asleep, Erika leaves with her siblings and brings them to a trusted friend of hers.
Her friend is also a motorcyclist for Bikers Against Child Abuse and is Erika's mentor. Erika lets her siblings explain their situation, followed by her mentor promising to help Erika with this legally and financially.
Erika finally lets her strong exterior crumble, crying tears of joy and thanking her mentor. Eventually, there's a trial and the parents lose custody.
For the siblings' safety, they are given new identities based on their favorite comics. Mari is given a prosthetic leg after serious complications were discovered in the week after she ran.
6 years later/Present Day....
Mari and Sunny have graduated. Erika is still a professional motorcyclist. Mari is signing up for a baseball or softball team, while Sunny is searching for a college with a good arts program, while also being a freelance artist to help his sisters.
They're happy. ACTUALLY HAPPY. Eventually, the siblings agree to move back to Faraway, both for Mari's career path and Sunny's education. Erika's mentor reminds them that they always have a home, which Erika appreciates.
Soon, they move back to Faraway...and for the time being, things go smoothly. Mari reunites with some of her friends (Daphne and Bowen), Sunny makes new friends (Cris, Mincy, Angel, and Mikhael), and Erika reunites with Aria (Arists).
However, things soon start to get complicated when a few certain old friends notice the siblings' return.
#omori#mari#sunny#omori mari#mari omori#sunny omori#omori sunny#omori au#omori oc#erika omori#omori ask blog
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Hi Ro! 🩶 Just wanted to drop in, to let you know how much I absolutely adore your art!! 🫶💕 (like it truly makes me so happy to see whenever you've posted a new one! 🥰)
So in relation to that I wanted to ask: What are the top 5 things that inspire you to do art? 👀
(also curious if there is anything about art in general, that you'd like to talk about! 🤗🩵)
Hey stella <333 thank you so much for enjoying my art :] I'm so glad you like it❤️
1. My hyperfixations - as soon as I join a Fandom or community I immediately feel the need to draw fanart for it, anything I'm passionate about really😅games, movies, fanfics, youtubers etc..
2. Other people - whenever I get requests for certain parings or drawings I get so happy because I'm like- "this person likes MY art so much they want to request!?" and I get so exited whenever someone even reblogs my stuff :D
3. People I love - anytime I have a friend that I love so dearly I constantly wanna draw them and give them gifts. If you somehow were able to look through my sketchbooks over the years, you would find month long periods where I would only be drawing one person. These things come and go but I love the rush of creativity I get whenever it happens :)))
4. Boredom - I know it's weird- hear me out. When I was in school I always found myself doodling in my notebooks when a class was boring (which it usually was haha) and it subconsciously really helped with my art journey and with my inspiration over the years.
5. Myself - sometimes I feel that the only way to express what's going on in my head is through art. It doesn't matter what kind. Sometimes I feel really overwhelmed and a random fucking poem about it pops into my head so I write down. Maybe I saw something really beautiful somewhere and absolutely HAD to draw what it made me feel. I find myself in so many things around me and I want to get it on paper or in my notes app just to preserve the feeling.
Art runs in my family, I have a few cousins who draw and on both my parents sides they have a history of it. Though my main inspiration to start drawing was my sister. My older sister draws so amazingly even three year-old me wanted to be like her. She unknowingly encouraged me to continue expressing myself and I am forever grateful for her. It's also so fun to see how other hobbies translate, for example I plays guitar; I didn't know this until after I started playing but my dad always wanted to play when he was a kid and my mom played guitar when she was in seventh grade (I started playing in seventh grade too!) my brother and my cousin also took a few classes and so did my grandpa on my mom's side. It's so cool to see things that don't seem genetic translate in different family members👍 okay sorry for the rant I got carried away😅😅
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Hey Sullie! I just want to thank you for all those danny bunch content!! I have two questions for you: What are your favourite roles by him and do you have a most favourite gif/pic of his?❤️❤️
Hellooo ❤️ I'm happy that you like my DB posts. Imma be real, I think I joined this fandom like suuuuuuper late, but when the time is right it's like 'that's it I've fallen to the bottom of the pit and there's no way up so I'm DEFINITELY staying' 😂
As for your questions:
1) favorite roles by Daniel Brühl: I couldn't choose only one 😭 so here's my as-short-as-it-can-be list.
- Niki Lauda in 'Rush' is guaranteed for the 1st place. I'm not a fan of F1 nor have any knowledge about it at all so I cannot say if his depiction of Lauda is accurate or not, BUT he gave one hell of the performance. Until this day, I'm still amazed how he could channel his emotions and his acting under those make-up & prosthetics. The hospital scene was a highlight. Solid AAA+++
It's sad to know that not only his fans were disappointed (in the Academy) because he didn't get an Oscar nomination, but it affected Daniel as well and it hit him really hard (according to his ARTE documentary). I know 2013 was a year filled with masterpieces here and there in every aspect, especially actors, I just wish he could get one among other nominees as well.
- Laszlo Kreizler in 'The Alienist' because there are uncountable amount of inner conflict in Kreizler. Again, I haven't read the book so I have no clue of the original, but I really like how he portrayed the alienist at that time. The healer of the mind who couldn't heal his own. A doctor who was capable of inflicting pain on others, even though it's unintentionally (he's a victim of domestic violence). A man who wanted honesty from others by telling them to face their demons but he, himself, couldn't bear the pain and face his own.
- Alex Garel in 'Eva'. There were so much subtlety, so much nuances in his performance, very repressed (in my opinion, which is totally in-character) and it paid off in the end (shoutout to Sergi Belbel, Cristina Clemente, Martí Roca & Aintza Serra who were writers for this movie.)
- Escherich in 'Alone in Berlin' because he could convince me, make me feel sympathetic for the inspector.
Man, I'm such a sucker for genius with different sides and shades in one person. Complex characters are my thing. 😂
2) favorite pic/gif of DB: NOOOO DON'T HURT ME THIS WAY 🥲 most of my fav are when Daniel was in film festivals, press con, masterclass or anything film-related. He looks sooo in the zone, like it's where he belongs.
But right now? This one
Why? Easy
I like Daniel.
I like men in white shirt.
I like men with this hairstyle (I am completely forgot how it's called at the time I'm typing this.)
I love cats.
And I like when someone I like playing with cats.
End of the story. 😌
(Also, I write this at 2am in my time so sorry for any misspelling or anything else. 😴)
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Redraw of my old ass Creepypasta OC (my first real OC, my Sonic OC doesn't count):
Rushed sketch, nothing makes sense. Also, long post incoming.
I'm not the one for cringe culture, I feel like it's dumb, the same with Mary Sues/Gary Sues. I believe any OC is good, not perfect, but good. It's a good start. Anyways, let me dump info about her!:
When I first joined the fandom I was already in the Undertale fandom, I began to get into the AU aspects of the Undertale fandom as well (this is important). I vividly remember giving her powers like Storyshift Chara has. I also watched 'I Eat Pasta for Breakfast' and I took a heavy inspo from Lazari and Stripes when making her story.
I also for some reason took inspiration from Hamilton??? Little me liked Hamilton (I'm not hating on the musical, I was just strangely into this kind of stuff). She was an 'UwU sofite' (not ironically) and everyone loved her because she was a child!
I totally did not use to take Quotev quizzes like "which creepypasta would be your brother/sister" and make the results and make them 'canon' for my OC. She was Jeff and Liu's little sister. Why? I don't know.
I named her 'Nickie'. I actually used to redesign her, change her story, and change personal things (age, gender, date of birth, etc.) about her as I grew older and started to figure out what I was doing.
She looked similar to Jeff, actually. However, I began to slowly make her recognizable as her own character. This is when I started playing with colors and tried out different color palettes. I was proud of myself, actually.
So yeah, what I am saying is: she was definitely not the best OC or Character concept I have created/thought of, but she played a role in helping me teach myself how to make a decent character. I may re-vamp her. For example, I may make her a soul trapped in a video game console for all the sins she has committed (this is a joke, sorta).
Or maybe she's a lost soul that guides children to the afterlife/their death? Who knows...?
I had a Gacha phase when I made her, if I had access to all of my old arts and Gacha screenshots of her, I would've posted them.
Anyways, I have to cut this short. It's pretty late for me. Goodnight (or good morning or good evening.)
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Thank you for the tag Lola and @lyranova!
How many works do you have on AO3?
53 (if we don't count the individual chapters of my oneshot collections as individual works, which would bring the total to... 400+)
Your top 5 stories by kudos/likes:
Teasing and yearning (smut oneshot collection)
Black clover oneshot collection
The Space Between Us (this is a collab)
Embers of Sun and Flame
Their lives (also oneshots)
Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
I do try to. But sometimes under some art pieces I've gotten comments where I genuinely don't know what to answer even if I should. (I'm specifically thinking about the one comment under my smut art where someone went "is it wrong to feel jealous?" and I was just ... baffled)
What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?
If we don't count oneshots in their original form, then maybe The Space Between Us
What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?
Most of my oneshots are fluffy. And happy. But maybe the ending that will be the happiest is the one I have for Embers. Or maybe it'll be bittersweet, but I do know how it ends. And I do consider it to be a happy ending
Do you write crossovers?
It appears our PR AU is now in past tense XD, but yeah, I do sometimes write crossovers. I'm just not interested in getting as involved with as many shows rn. But if I am convinced, then sure
Have you ever received hate on a fic?
On a fic? No (Have there been mean spirited comments elsewhere? Yes.)
Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
Yup. Uhh... Wdym what kind? Pretty descriptive most of the time
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Yes.
Have you ever had a fic translated?
One of the fics that was stolen from me, was translated. So... yeah.
Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Many. And will do again!
What’s your all-time favorite ship?
All time? Uhh... I assume this is canon ships too, so... Royai. I think they're perfect
What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?
I want to finish pretty much all of my wips. But I fear that the Gods AU may stay as it is
What are your writing strengths?
I think my descriptions and general writing style is unique?
What are your writing weaknesses?
It's repetitive across fics? I think? Also I've had the issue of writing characters ooc lately
What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
I think that if it fits the character, you should do it. And if you want to keep things from the reader for a while. I didn't do it for Embers, because there would have been too much lost for the reader, but if it had been smaller things, then for sure! It can be a good tool
What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?
I generally write for fandoms and ships that I want to write for. As in, I have works for those ships that have piqued my interest for a reason or another. So far I have no particular plans for others
What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?
Embers is my baby. I've but so so so many hours, and so much thought and plans into it. Worked out power-balances between characters, lore of Thea, the character lore in general, the non-verbal language for the Curiosi family. The trilogy that has been ongoing for 4 years now, and which started from the first book. This is my favourite and it is my child. If you disrespect it, you disrespect me. (Looking at that those couple meanspirited discord messages from 2 years ago. Yes. I am holding grudges for them.)
For oneshots... I think this one False hope -Fuegoleon Vermillion
My YamiChar series How we became ourselves and us is quicky becoming a favourite as well. I find it insightful to write
And Omnes sumus peccatores - Ex igni natus for the flirting. Yes this is rushed build-up too but I am having too much fun with the flirting, and in my head they are already in the relationship soo...
I think all my writer friends have been tagged already, so... anyone who wants to join may do so!
Fanfic writer interview!
tagged by @ashenaura. Merci bien ! ;)
How many works do you have on AO3?
145.
Your top 5 stories by kudos/likes:
I'll Follow
Where The Heart Is
Your World
Everything and More
Brittlest
(... yup, it's all SAU and those numbers will never not shock me)
Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Of course. It might take me forever (my inbox is staring at me dead in the eyes), but I will respond. It means the world to me and if anyone makes the effort, they deserve a response. Easy.
What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?
I need happy endings with my angst so... yeah. I think... Yesterday I died (tomorrow's bleeding) is quite sad.
What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?
I guess the SAU has the happiest ending. Everything And More's last chapter is literally sunshine and calmness which, yk, is needed after the whole thing.
Do you write crossovers?
I've just gotten into it! I didn't see the hype before but um that was because I never tried to mash together the right verses I think. The Arkham Horror x Black Clover crossover is very dear to me.
Have you ever received hate on a fic?
*touching wood* Nope.
Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
I've written steamy but never full smut. Well, I've written bits. But they're unpublished and I don't think I ever will publish them soooo yeah.
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not to my knowledge, no.
Have you ever had a fic translated?
Yes! Someone translated Her Most Precious Memories in Russian (Её самые драгоценные воспоминания).
Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Just like crossovers, I'm just getting into it. And just like crossovers, I'm absolutely loving it.
@kalolasfantasyworld knows. We've written that Olympics Swimming one, Silver Scorching Interdimensional Slash: the Magical Medley Relay of Doom, and we're writing the most wonderful Formula for a Crush.
What’s your all-time favorite ship?
All time favorite... royai probably.
it's just the angst... it's just the sillies... it's just the war criminals... there's a dog... they're both so stupid... i love them...
What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?
fhjfhds all of them. If I start a wip it's that I want to see it finished (because I want to read it). Sadly, I often don't have the motivation to. The wip list is ever growing.
What are your writing strengths?
Dialogue and internal monologues, I think.
What are your writing weaknesses?
Besides everything syntax and grammar-related because what even is English, I'd say description, especially of action scenes. It takes me forever to even dare put down a few words and I always feel like I'm describing like a 7yo would (no shade to 7yo but surely with 20 more years on this planet I should be able to do better).
What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
I did it in Formula for a Crush for Vanessa and Helena because Helena typically does it so it felt normal to As long as it's one word or one expression I don't really mind. (my Italian is non-existent and my Spanish is uhhh not good so, there's that.).
In my own work, I prefer to keep it in English and italicize. Less risk to completely fumble a whole language.
(I just realized that Zora doesn't even utter one word in French in FFAC and I'm French [I dare think I can speak and write the language relatively well]. so it's less down to messing up a language than personal preferences in writing ig..? I never really thought about it.)
What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?
Nothing comes to mind. Rarepair Week was a great occasion to tick some of these boxes too.
What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?
I've had this question ten thousand times and I think I reply differently every time dhjfdjskj. It's a tough one.
Right now I'm having a lot of fun with Formula for a Crush (nah, you can't tell with how much I'm talking about it).
what even is football anyway will always be very dear to me and I'll probably say it's this one.
Blue Hours (and its sequel, I might even like the sequel more simply for the rant about the dishes) is special because I loved the concept and I experienced a bit with the narration.
Thicker Than Blood because it's a longer one and it was a really non-pressure kind of fic (I expected no one to read it so I really had fun)
Yesterday I died (tomorrow's bleeding) and posing questions to a silent universe (my very thoughts a curse) for some nice Mia angst.
Lost in a storm, It’s a big office, chief, for some nice Phoenix angst.
Tell Me About Cruelty means a lot to me.
(you might realize: I cannot choose. I'm looking at the 145 fics and I'm like. they're all special to me in some way. even those I wish I could erase from the face of the earth I'm like. I like that line, that scene, that hug. it's terrible and it's wonderful.)
--
tagging (no pressure, do it if you want) @kalolasfantasyworld (because ofc I'm tagging you), @wildflowerwoodsworld
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TBHK theory: is Tsukasa really the "abuser"? + the meaning of the ropes
So I know that it is a common belief in the fandom that Hanako was abused by someone close to him since he did say that "he forgives it". And since he forgives it, it's obvious that it must be someone important to him, right? And that someone is most likely Tsukasa... or is it?
The reason why we think that is because of Hanako's reactions to when he runs into Tsukasa. So I guess a lot of us just assumed that he reacted that way because he's scared of Tsukasa. But I think that rather being scared of Tsukasa, he's scared of himself. Remember when he jumped on Yashiro after Tsukasa first showed up? I can't find the post anymore but I do remember someone saying that reenacting a past traumatic experience is a common way to "deal" with it. Thus he jumped on Yashiro to emulate that because seeing Tsukasa made him remember when he killed him. Which is why he's always so uncomfortable around Tsukasa: because it makes him think of a traumatic event. Not necessarily because Tsukasa was the "abuser".
We also have this image:
Which makes us think that Tsukasa might be the abuser because Hanako is bound by ropes while a shadow that looks like Hanako is saying something in his ear. A common idea here, is that the shadow is Tsukasa, however I'm not sure about that. If it really is Tsukasa, then why does he not have the patch on his right cheek? It might just be me, but besides the clothes, I think that the obvious way to tell Hanako and Tsukasa apart is the patches they have on their cheeks. Hanako's is on his left cheek and Tsukasa's is on the right. But as we can see the shadow doesn't have Tsukasa's patch. If the shadow does have a patch then it's on the side that we can't see: the left side, the same as Hanako's.
Thus, I think that this shadow might, or might not be a metaphoric representation of Hanako himself, fucking himself over and tying himself town out of guilt because he killed his brother. Hanako is blaming himself. After all, we can also see the knife being bound as a way to remind himself of what he did.
Oh, and let's talk about the ropes.
Another belief is that maybe Hanako was abused with ropes, that Tsukasa may have been into... bondage?? And he did that to his twin brother?? This doesn't sound right, doesn't it?
Tsuchigomori says: "you're always covered in cuts and bruises" but there's no mention of ropes. I mean, I'm only assuming here, but if the abuser really did use ropes then wouldn't they be easy to see? Tsuchigomori also says that it happens every single day so all the bruises he has on his body must always be fresh/recent, right? I would guess that rope bruises are really easy to identify whether you're a nurse or a normal person.
But then... What the hell do the ropes mean?! Well I have an easy answer to give: those ropes are a recurring theme in TBHK.
Almost all of the covers of the volumes have ropes on them and even side art from Aida.
Look at this:
So there could be 2 different explanations for this:
1) Aida likes drawing ropes
2) Ropes are a metaphor for something
I think it's obviously answer n°2.
Maybe what I'm going to say sounds super obvious, but I feel like ropes are a way to show us that all of those characters are "bound" together. Their stories and lives are all tied together since they're all important characters in the story and they're the ones to move the plot forward.
We can see it especially here:
The rope is tied to Hanako's pinky finger, and most times, in Japanese culture they call that the "red string of fate". Basically, you're tied to someone else. Which is most times your soulmate. That whole rope thing means that all of those characters' fates are tied to eachother.
But now the last point: if I don't think that the abuser is Tsukasa and that the rope doesn't mean that Hanako was abused with ropes then what the hell does this all mean? Who's the abuser?
Well to be honest... I don't know.
I think the obvious answer here would be their parents. I mean, we know nothing about them. Where are they?? Could Hanako and Tsukasa be orphans?
Maybe they were abused in the orphanage, after all, it's common knowledge that Japanese orphanages are shit. (Or at least they were shittier back then, maybe now it's better but I'm not a specialist in the subject.)
Also, isn't it weird how we always saw past Hanako but never past Tsukasa? Why? Why haven't we seen him yet? Maybe because Tsukasa was abused even more than Hanako.
Let me explain: we got this whole explanation
This is in chapter 46 when Amane was talking about Scorpius and Antares, and how they're actually twin stars but that one of the 2 is brighter than the other so you can only see one of them. (Sorry for the quality of the image, I can't find better.)
This is obviously a metaphor for Amane and Tsukasa. So what does it all mean?
Well, long story short: I think that Tsukasa wasn't allowed to go to school while Amane was.
If my orphanage theory is correct, then I would guess that the orphanage had funding issues (I mean, it's a problem even to this day and not only in Japan. Orphanages being short on money because the governement doesn't care enough to help abandoned kids is ocurrent.)
So I don't find that hard to believe that the orphanage might've been like "Fuck it! Let' send the older twin brother to school and the younger one can stay here. We can't afford to send all of our children to school after all." I mean it's weird, right? That in the flashback Tsuchigomori didn't even mention Tsukasa. If Tsukasa was really going to school and was the abuser then wouldn't Tsuchigomori be like "oh, it's weird how your twin brother doesn't have any bruises while you do. Is he the one to do this?"
But no. There is absolutely no mention of Tsukasa whatsoever. Which is really, really weird. I had twins in my classroom throughout elementary school and middle school and they were always put in the same classroom. So if Tsukasa really did go to school I would guess that they would not only be in the same classroom, but also Tsuchigomori would bring him up.
Thus while Amane was in school, Tsukasa was the one being abused, and that's why he's so fucked in the head. Because Tsukasa was actually the one getting most of the beatings, the cuts and the bruises.
Of course, school in Japan lasts longer than in the west with the clubs and all. But I would guess that Amane didn't join a club because he wanted to get back as quickly as possible to help his brother. That's why Amane didn't have any friends. Because he would always rush to the orphanage after school.
I think, Amane being the caring big brother he is, he would take the abuse instead of Tsukasa when he was "home" to protect him as much as he could, but since he was at school most of the time, Tsukasa was the one taking most of the beatings.
And since Amane was going to school, I would guess that they went "easier" on him so the teachers wouldn't call the cops on them. That's also why Amane decided "not to go anywhere anymore."
Because whenever he's away from his brother, Tsukasa gets hurt. Amane decided to throw his dream away to protect Tsukasa from the abusers.
And so, that is also why I think that Tsukasa has a mental illness. That's why he's so much more emotionally unstable than Amane. Hanako has obviously problems too, but Tsukasa is the one who got the short end of the stick.
I would guess, Tsukasa may be a sociopath at this point. A current belief, is that sociopaths like to hurt animals/kill them to feel something. When someone is abused, what the brain does is to "repress" emotions to feel less pain. That's how different mental illnesses get born.
For example, "dissociating" to feel like you're not you, to believe that it's someone else who's suffering right now your brain tries to make you believe that you're "out" of your body.
Dissociative personality disorder makes you develop multiple personalities inside yourself so you can switch between them and feel like you're safe while another personality is taking the abuse for you.
And then, of course, sociopathy, your brain "turns off" your emotions for you to stay "sane" but funnily enough, in the long run it makes you insane since you can't feel emotions in normal situations anymore.
A lot of mental illnesses come from traumatic experiences, they're defensive mechanisms after all. Mental illnesses are your brain trying to protect you from excessive pain...
This got dark real quick, sorry.
Anyway, this whole theory started with a thought I had: "Why would a sibling, not to mention a TWIN, abuse his brother?"
The conclusion I came to is: they wouldn't.
I'm not saying that it's definitely impossible at a 100% but I always found that weird how everyone thinks that a twin sibling would abuse his other sibling. Especially since twins are so close.
And to end it all...
I think that what went down with the Yugi siblings is that, one day they decided to end it all. They couldn't take the suffering anymore so they decided to kill themselves.
But right at the end, Tsukasa's emotions finally kicked in and he got scared at the last moment. And so, he begged Amane to finish the job. Amane then got traumatized from killing his brother and he ran to the girls' bathroom and hung himself out of guilt. Or maybe he also stabbed himself like Tsukasa? Who knows.
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